Regrets and resolutions

I don’t usually do a whole lot in the way of New Year’s resolutions. I feel that they’re usually destined for failure. People are too specific, or too ambitious.
This year, I’m being intentionally broad in my resolution. I resolve to make a real effort to do things that make me happy, and not to waste time. Too often, I space out in front of the TV with Mike watching something I’ve already watched time and time again. I want to put my time to better use. I used to love reading, or going from site to site finding music that I enjoy. I want to be better about spending my time in those pursuits. I want to do something every day ( or at least a few times a week) that makes me truly happy. I neglect that far too often, and only spend my time on the necessary or the banal. I miss reading a really great book, or enjoying a good film. I’m not just going to aim to read more or watch more quality movies. I really just want to focus on doing things that make me happy, whether in the short or long run.
I feel like I live too much of my life in regret. I make a lot of mistakes, to be fair. Many of those are easily fixed. However, I spent a lot of time in my youth pursuing things that offered no sort of long or even genuine short-term satisfaction. I waited to get to know my father, on a real and adult manner, until it was too late. I do feel in many ways that it is too late to work on that relationship with my mother. Age and loss have transformed her into a being that is truly unrecognizable to me. She used to be a person I revered. For better or worse, people, or at least our views on those people, change. But there are many relationships in my life that are still salvageable. I don’t want to miss opportunities by thinking there will always be more time. Sooner or later, time runs out.

Advertisements

One thought on “Regrets and resolutions

  1. I wish you good luck!I'm trying to better myself as well, but I'm not telling anyone what I'm attempting. That way, if/when I fail, I haven't let anyone down but myself.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s